A True American Mystery

SPEACIAL AGENT DALE COOPER: (to Diane) "There are two things that continue to trouble me, and I'm speaking now not only as an agent of the Bureau, but also as a human being. What really went on between Marilyn Monroe and the Kennedys, and who really pulled the trigger on JFK?"

The above quote was spoken in the first episode of the cult hit television show Twin Peaks and through the character of Dale Cooper the troubling circumstances surrounding the deaths of two iconic Americans and the profound effect those deaths had on the American psyche are echoed. A chilling moment in a television show filled with them.

Speaking as both an American and an inquiring mind, one thing continues to trouble me in regard to R. Kelly's master-stroke Trapped in the Closet.

In the opening lines of the work, Mr. Kelly sings:

Seven o'clock in the morning and the rays from the sun wakes me. I'm stretchin' and yawning in a bed that don't belong to me. Then a voice yells "Good morning Darling" from the bafroom. Then she comes out and kisses me and to my surprise she ain't you.

These opening lines would lead one to assume that Mr. Kelly is singing the song to his wife or girlfriend, thereby relating the story of his sexual transgressions to her. But if you really think about the song and the story Mr. Kelly tells, you will realize that his wife is actually in the story (she is caught sleeping with the policeman who pulled the narrator over on his way home) and is referred to in the third person, therefore negating the earlier assumption.

So my question is: Who could Mr. Kelly possibly be singing the song to if not his wife? If to his surprise it wasn't "you", and "you" is not his wife, then who did he expect to walk out of the bafroom on that fateful morning?